Sucker

"Never jump into a pile of leaves with a wet sucker."  — Charles M. Schulz

His Resurection Is My Freedom

Thank You Second Baptist Church, Houston, Texas.

Hugs 'n Giggles 'n Kisses 'n Grins

I will not play at tug o' war.
I'd rather play at hug o' war,
Where everyone hugs
Instead of tugs,
Where everyone giggles
And rolls on the rug,
Where everyone kisses,
And everyone grins,
And everyone cuddles,
And everyone wins.
— Shel Silverstein

Loony-Goony Dance

Draw a crazy picture,
Write a nutty poem, 
Sing a mumble-gumble song,
Whistle through your comb.
Do a loony-goony dance
'Cross the kitchen floor,
Put something silly in the world
That ain't been there before.
— Shel Silverstein

Perfect Advice

Advise For The Perfectionist...
Wash Windows On A Cloudy Day.

Flowers

Annuals:  Flowers you plant this year to come up later this year.  They're nice.


Biennials:  Flowers you plant this year to grow next year.  They're really pretty.


Perennials:  Flowers you plant this year to grow until further notice.  They're absolutely gorgeous.


Re-annuals:  Flowers you plant this year to come up last year.  You ought to see those suckers.

A Whole Flock

Once upon a time, I planted a bag of bird seed.  The only problem was, before I could pick any the whole flock flew away.

Thank You Lord

"How can anyone not believe in God?"  How can anyone believe that what you are about to see is all just "random" and happened "just by chance"? 

This is a time lapse video from Norwegian photographer Terje Sorgjerd taken on El Teide in the Canary Islands and captures the Milky Way galaxy overhead as sand wafts across the landscape as gold clouds.

You must watch this in "full screen" mode.  Remember, FULL SCREEN MODE.  It's awesome !!!
Note that the full screen toggle (which you should use!) is in between the “HD” and the word “Vimeo”:

The Mountain from Terje Sorgjerd on Vimeo.

Thank You "The Blaze"

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Grumpy Old Men

Grumpy old men don't have no grandchildren.  But if they do they don't know it.

Church Clothes

One Sunday morning, an old cowboy entered a church just before services were to begin. Although the old man and his clothes were spotlessly clean, he wore jeans, a denim shirt and boots that were worn and ragged. In his hand he carried a worn-out old hat and an equally worn, dog-eared Bible.


The church he entered was in a very upscale and exclusive part of the city. It was the largest and most beautiful church the old cowboy had ever seen. The people of the congregation were all dressed with expensive clothes and fine jewelry. As the cowboy took a seat, the others moved away from him. No one greeted, spoke to, or welcomed him. They were all appalled by his appearance and did not attempt to hide it.

As the old cowboy was leaving the church, the preacher approached him and asked the cowboy to do him a favor. "Before you come back in here again, have a talk with God and ask him what he thinks would be appropriate attire for worship in church." The old cowboy assured the preacher he would.

The next Sunday, he showed back up for the services wearing the same ragged jeans, shirt, boots, and hat. Once again he was completely shunned and ignored. The preacher approached the cowboy and said, "I thought I asked you to speak to God before you came back to our church."

"I did," replied the old cowboy.

"And what was his reply?" asked the preacher.

"Well, sir, God told me that he didn't have a clue what I should wear. He said he'd never been inside this church."

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Three Ships

Your average politician is 50% leadership, 50% showmanship and 100% bullship.

Clinging

Clinging is just hugging that's worn out its welcome.